Channeling health and happiness

Johannah can beat me in pickleball even though I’ve played longer, I try harder and she’s EIGHTY years old. The only reason I’m better than 73 year old Lillian is because she took 6 weeks off to perfect her eyes through cataract surgery.  Today, the 3 of us enjoyed coffee overlooking a huge water aerobics class. Lillian’s lumpectomy, and 5 years of tamoxifen (cheaper and less side effects than the aromatase inhibitors) are history that ended in 2007. Johannah’s daughter suffered a divorce right after having a baby and Johannah gave up her career as a nurse to raise her granddaughter- way more fun than the original kids-she loved staying home and being a PTA grandma.

My first patient today is about 45 years old with 6 kids. He just got done riding his Harley Davidson to Reno to meet his brother who biked from Colorado.  His work will take him to Korea, Japan, China, Taiwan and India this summer. “Exactly what do you do at Microsoft these days?” I had to ask. He exercises enough to largely avoid my office.   “I’m in charge of Access and EXEL” I demanded more detail before he finally admitted “Vice president…has a nice ring to it doesn’t it?”

My second patient has landed back at her parents at the age of 31 after completing her MBA. Her boyfriend, in exactly the same boat lives with his parents. The parents do NOT permit sleep overs. But all is not lost. The boyfriend plans to hike the Pacific Crest Trail and the two enjoyed the world cup and visited friends in S. Africa this year.

Then I had 2 boys with the same name…. A 6 month old who  held perfectly still when I checked his ears  (and wiggled constantly before and after ) and a 20 year old whose pot/cigarettes/alcohol didn’t even cause a ripple in his family due to a severely bipolar brother and a sister just recovering from addiction to cocaine/pot/alcohol/cigarettes/ADD medications ANG bulemia for good measure.  The youngest child in that family is overweight but the sweetest best adjusted kid ever. The parents cope amazingly well. The right combination of optimism, seeing that things could be worse, and steering their adult kids back into society. I actually think they’ll fully succeed.

That’s it- just 4 patients today. Aren’t you lucky?  Then Levi ran next to my bike to Crossroads and on to other errands.  He stays on the narrow sidewalks avoiding cars without a leash.

I missed breakfast and had a little salmon, 1 TBS yoghurt and some cornbread for lunch and had an excessively good mood all day.I think it’s meant to add to the positive energy Emily, Andy, and Summer are giving to Iris while they stay with her during her recovery from radiation.  She’s going to drink more water and coke and find the perfect balance of rest and activity so she has the strength to meet me and Lauren in Mexico Saturday.  

Dear Diary,

Summer got 5th in the Washington State 2A track meet in Tacoma running the 400 meter in basically a minute flat. She also competed at the state level in the 4x200 m relay and she remains disgustingly sweet and successful in her hard 10th grade classes…ie she’s perfect but that’s not what I want to brag about.

Today a guy asked me if I worked out just on the basis of my forearms AND I was standing next to Summer AND he looked like a young weight lifter and most flabbergasting of all, he worked at the counter of the Washington State Dept of Licensing. Secondly,  when I played cutthroat pickleball with Tom ( a mortal) and Jerry (the best the YMCA has), I momentarily tied Jerry with a 3-3-0 score before Jerry went on to show both Tom and me who’s boss. And most exciting of all…. ( I know you’re breathless), Emily and I were the most cheerful, chipper and polite members of our family from 10 pm to midnight tonight. Chew on that awhile perfect Lauren, Eric, and Summer!

And to flesh out the progress report, my book is coming along…I combined about 5 timelines into one grand prologue to denouement timeline today and I’m enjoing my characters…. the real life model for my villain could still be more evil than the character but I don’t want any character to be all bad….And Anna Lukas (moved to US from St Petersburg in 1980)  has agreed to talk to me so I can borrow her Russian accent for my character with bad English.

Eric’s got escargot begonias, lettuce, cilantro, and artistic combinations of beautiful plants in his sweet smelling hot house out back where the chickens used to live. He also scrubbed the dog and restored to mint condition the kitchen table I recomended for  goodwill in 1987. Who new it would be his life’s project and the crowded underpinning of  leisurely, laughter filled dinners with 3 adult daughters and their friends.

Dale Carnegie’s advice on How to stop worrying and start living is really helping. At least I notice that I’m  an idiot when I worry about the earth’s destruction without seeing the cul de sac in front of me.I instead open my eyes to  towering douglas firs and cedars sheltering the rhodedenra, apple and maple trees, exuberant weeds (our yard) and showcase gardens of my neighbors. Only  the wooden houses appear fragile.  My patient stream  definitely  supports Carnegie’s assessment that the majority of sickness stems from worry.

Speaking of the psychological beating the physical, Iris is probably halfway through her radiation now. Good thing she’s resting anytime she wants during this treatment because…we’re all descending upon her to mourn the loss of Judy’s youth (40th birthday bash for my Jookness). She’s then travelling to Miami with Summer, Lynelle, Emily, and Andy to visit Carol Lipson and see Bob and Lisa’s new house on Coconut Grove AND THEN, Emily and Summer will take her to the Tampa airport so Lauren can pick her up at the Guadalajara Airport. Carol and I will arrive shortly thereafter.  By the end of the trip, we’ll successfully shove that breast cancer back behind  the rest of the junk we forget easily.

The Handmaid’s Tale joins 1984 and Brave New World as excellent examples of Dystopian speculative fiction. I wish I could find an excellent example of Utopian speculative fiction. But maybe that’s the one thing correct in “The Rational Optimist” (lousy brand new out in hardback) The best minds tend toward pessimism for the future. Yuck. Yeah- an advantage to losing brain cells with age!

Summer’s momentum includes Iris

After winning 1st place in the 400m run in the last 2 varsity meets, Summer pole vaulted 7 feet 6 inches (her best is 8 feet) then casually mentionned that she was skipping today’s 400m race and running only in the 4x4 relay. Also, she’s running 1st in the relay instead of her usual spot as anchor.

Watching Summer speed  around the track, we were a little surprised that one person was ahead of her. “Wait, is that a guy?” Eric asked. “Of course not, I retorted,” forgetting that Eric’s never wrong.  Summer didn’t seem to know it was a guy either and she just about caught up to him. Her split was a carefully timed 59.6 seconds, way faster than the amazing personal record from just 5 days ago: 61.7!  She hugged us after the race even though 3 or 4 boys were standing there. Then another boy ran up to report that the girl Summer just beat was recruited from Italy to run the 400m race for Bellevue High School!

Solly informed me the same night that Iris’s cancer came back in the same place but it’s tiny. Luckily, she now likes her Indian oncologist at home and is now willing to have surgery and radiation. Summer’s victory helped me handle this news and her strength and example will help Iris sail through treatment #2 just like we had FUN during treament #1.  Iris feels her weight and Rafi could be contributing factors.  These are 2 solvable issues.  My pickleball friends Kurt and lillian are a lovely Jewish couple who have been happily separated since 1988. He’s obviously a negative character and she is obviously flourishing at the age of 73. Iris can get this treatment behind her, have a wonderful 70th birthday celebration in Guadalajara followed by a trip with me to Denver and if she likes, start the next phase of her life single or happily separated.  Rafi loves her very much and can show that whenever she invites him for dinner or another date.

Iris is scared about age 69 because that’s when her dad died but that age will come and go. It may not be the very best year of her life but still an excellent one like all the other years. MANY MANY MANY good years will come after age 69. If she needed them, Summer, Lynelle, Bethany, Lauren, Emily, Derek, Sierra, and Zachary would all see to it but she doesn’t need their tugging. Iris is the source of all these kids’ strength and Iris will see herself through this irritation.

book progress

Dog exhausted, latte still hot in thermal cup, and sun boldly finding cracks in the dark gray clouds, I sat at my oak dining room table overlooking the tangled woods we share with the neighbors and actually  progressed in my book development. My goal is to begin the first draft this month. I’m relieved that I don’t have to be in Starbucks to write because there are a dozen reasons that place can be irritating. The Girl with the Dragon Tatoo is  re-igniting my motivation.

Today, I became reaquainted with a little patient I hadn’t seen for awhile. Curtis is now fully mature. He’s 3 feet tall, over 20 lbs and weighed all my requests very seriously. Yes, I could look in his ears and the stethoscope could be placed on his back as long as he examined it first. He seemed satisfied that, except for a sticker, his body would take care of the rest of the treatment. I was very satisfied that his immunizations are all done til kindergarten.

In pickle ball, the left court was filled with elders who enjoy resting, can’t move too fast and generally play at my level.  The right court attracted our best players plus Sebastian who crosses the court  and slams the ball so fast your eyes and  brain can’t even follow it coherently.   “Can I play with you guys?” I couldn’t help migrating towards the experts.  Sebastian and I were beat by the 2 next best players.  They wanted more competition but neither was willing to be handicapped having me as a partner. So we had a rematch.  I played well enough to not destroy the magic of Sebastian and we won the next game. After the departure of the second best player Jerry (3rd best) and I played together against Sebastian. We had one of the longest games on record and although he didn’t admit to being tired, Sebastian kept having to dry his face with his T shirt and, at the very very end, Jerry and I won. Best of all, Sebastian, generally inpatient with the lot of us, smiled.

Only her new pole vault coach and Summer are able to do the strength training prescribed at day one of practice. One kid asked why Summer was stronger than the other kids. Wesley (state pole vaulter last year and Andy’s friend ) said, “it’s because she’s a Hanson!”  I love that!!  And Lauren is totally serious about the Rock N Roll Half Marathon June 26th. We hope to fly to Tampa June 27th for Judy’s 40th birthday party.  Going to bed so I can be in the pool early tomorrow. I’m thinking about Leora, Rina and Jim W.  I wish they shared the wonderful health most of our family enjoys.

At dinner we were talking about how young Carol and Eric look, then how young I look (not really) and the girls said I had a better figure than women my age. “Any age!” Eric piped in and “You should see her without her clothes on!” I could NOT believe he said that. OMG. Of course, I’m happy but in front of the girls!!?!?!?

Home

I’m so happy to finally be home. Eric and I had a week off work with NO airline tickets and we spent the whole thing running away from home. I want to stay here forever and sit in my lazy boy, eat food from my pantry, watch my TV, sew on buttons,  read my books. If I’m seized with a torrent of ambition, I’ll play the piano.  But what did we do all week? Snow shoed at Mt. Rainier, biked to Redmond Town Center, (discovered the Three Lion Pub where I should take Rafi!)  Kayaked the Sammamish River, skied at Crystal Mountain with Lauren and Carlos, and endured a deafening announcer at the Mat Classic State Wrestling championship in Tacoma. Andy and Summer were both state level contenders!  We did stay at Hotel Murano in Tacoma…

Oh, one more excursion- as soon as Summer lost her second match at State, I drove her to Portland for Junior Statesmen of America in the Doubletree.I’d like to chaperone that if I ever leave home again- the kids debate issues like marijuana legalization, secession of the NW states to form Cascadia, banning of factory farming for animal rights, widespread government promotion of hybrid cars, and one proposed bill wanted to end all subsidzed housing. Oh, another proposed to end all governement sactionned marriage so that gays and straights alike could enter civil unions instead. The kids at JSA wore  dresses and suits and milled around the fancy hotel lobby carrying laptops.

Big contrast from the Mat Classic where Carol, Eric, and I experienced  2000 wrestlers in one room…  wrestlers with bulky deltoids and biceps  would whip off their caps to reveal the  long hair of a girl. Muscular boys would toss each other around the mat like rag dolls. Mental and physical energy  was focused on  keeping opponents shoulder blades flat on the mat long enough for the ref to slap the mat and blow his whistle. Summer was calm and looked formidable with strong,  wide shoulders and muscular legs, and her chin held high. Coach Andy Wong texted her  that all the coaches were proud of the excellent work she did this season. It is unusual for a first year wrestler to make it to state competition.   I slept in Portland before turning around to pick up Eric in Tacoma. Carol  and I passed on I5 as she drove south and I drove north.

Tonight, we brought Summer home from the Portland to Issaquah bus. Before I took my coat off, my neighbor asked me to look at her one week old son, Hunter Benjamin. He was nice and pink but had nasal flaring, subcostal retractions and a little grunting when flat on his back. I had to advise her to take him in to the hospital for additional observation.  Oh I feel for my neighbors. They have to leave this cozy cul de sac that I’m going to cling to for a long time. I’m so glad my parents are coming here soon. One more reason I don’t need to go anywhere.  I’ll be glad when Hunter’s back for a long restful stay too.

Novelist bootcamp, zumiez, and physicians without borders.

Emmy’s doing quite a bit of modeling for Zumiez. First her torso and chin appeared on their website. Then: waist up, smiling face showing.  And a head to toe appearance is next. She’s even modeling their shoes. Also,  they’re transferring  photos to a thumb drive so she can build a portfolio. I need to detach further from her business though. She’s leaning away from lifeguard teacher training this week-end as if she’ll have future opportunities and I just told her it could be this week-end or never. Her boss thinks the training is important and she wants to be a head guard. She got mad at me of course. I need to stay out of it. She’s not headed to be a pro lifeguard anyway.

I’m ahead of schedule on book planning but I’m going to redo all the steps to make them stronger before I start the draft. I’m glad the schedule’s in place so I can’t berate myself for taking more time to make the character cards, scene lists, character matrix and BIC stronger.

Work’s great as usual. I’m nudging Roberto to quit smoking (enlist help from your kids and buy patches!) I’m encouraging a 35 year old to add yoga, cycling and swimming since his running obessession is hurting his knees and back. And several patients and I are doing every last thing we can do to prevent cancer. I”m helping a newly pregnant 34 year old control and monitor her blood pressure. My office is clean and my hours beautifully controlled.

With a little help from Eric, Lauren seems to be doing just fine in computer science, her most challenging class at UW. I love how calmly she takes the whole college thing. She’s sweet and helps a lot around the house.

Sebastian and I beat Roger and Chris today in pickle ball. Also, Lillian and I beat Curt and Jim and we’ve also beat Curt and Gary. We’re moving up.

Summer lost her wrestling match against a Redmond High School 119 lb sophomore JV guy. She only lost by 2 points. Now, the spotlight’s on the varsity kids and Andy will be wrestling soon.

Plus tomorrow’s supposed to be partly sunny which is as close as we get to sunny and Denni, Luke, Eric and I are skiing at Crystal Mtn tomorrow!  And tomorrow night, Eric and I are  finally going to temple.

A guy at pickleball suggested I take my French speaking medical skills to Haiti for the earthquake.  That is one horrible idea! But I am volunteering for Earthcorps and a free clinic. Also, I told Eric that if our overseas sabatical with Microsoft doesnt’ work out, I could work for medecins sans frontier (it’s actually a paid position) and he could come. That’ll keep him on track for Microsoft in France! Doctors without Borders badly needs French speaking doctors but they ONLY go to the worst places on earth.  Also, I still want to do volunteers for Israel.

Mr Harvard Freshman

He won. Ruth Lidawer, our cousin, survived the concentration camps and moved to Miami looking like a 7 year old at age 16. Now, her grandson is Mr. Harvard Freshman. How can anyone else be excited about their college kids?

Today, as usual,I worked too long before lunch. Walking home ravenous, I vowed to eat, relax and return to work on time… no extra projects today. Once again, Emily had magically reappeared in Bellevue from Bellingham. But she was rushing to put on make up and depart for an orchestra concert in Yakima. Apple, tofu, rice, clean up…and…

“I want to go to Florida for 6 weeks this summer, study in California and work at Sea World, stay in Bellingham on week-ends, get an apartment with Lucille…” Emily blurted out rushing down the stairs thickly lashed eyes tearing up. “I don’t want to switch schools just for some guy!” “If I bring up anything that takes me away, Andy gets so upset!” “I’m not going to Bellevue College and I really like Western.”

Emily was listening to her intuition and facing some really difficult decisions. Andy seemed like he’d walk down the aisle with her any day of the week and no parent could possibly disapprove of Andy. Both Andy and Lauren badly want Emily to transfer to Univ of Washington in Seattle.

For once, when I apologized to my first patient, I wasn’t berating myself even though I was a full 5 minutes late. Those 5 were needed at home.

I dove right into anxiety week at Gwen’s office. One patient, overwhelmed by her toddler quickly aborted when she discovered a second pregnancy. Now, she worries incessantly about her 2 year old, waking up 4 times a night to give her drinks and change her diapers. Another, determined not to ruin her make up by crying, suffered from exploding tears describing the panic she suffered for weeks from the pain and bewilderment of undiagnosed reflex sympathetic dystrophy. Now, 8 years later, a swollen ankle pushed her towards an imaginary abyss. A retired engineer worries that irregular heartbeats will knock his newly replaced heart valve out of place. And a 13 year old describes the text messages she sends her friends…impotent attempts to ease her depression.

“ANSWER” says an angry text from Lauren. Finally at 5:30 PM, I call her back. “Just 2 things,” she says.” There’s a large envelope from UW here for Emily and I’m going out to dinner with Sophie.”

“O..M..G..” was Emily’s text when she heard. “Now I have some decisions to make.” During her drive home from Yakima, Emily has to choose between her wonderful suite mates, independence, and professors at Western Washington Univ. and her family and friends here at home. Also, she’s considering studying industrial engineering, only offered at Univ.of Washington. She also wants to spend 6 weeks in Florida this summer with her grandparents and cousins. I warned her NOT to mention this until she’s sure or she’ll break hearts of all ages in that state.

Lauren has decided to train for Seattle’s Rock N Roll Half Marathon in March when her book is finished and she’s trying to get it published. I guess UW permits her a little extra time on the side. Carlos is reporting from Guadalajara to her side promptly on Valentine’s Day.

Summer is wrestling in a regional girls tournament in Sedro Woolley tomorrow. If she wins her 1st and 3rd matches, she’ll qualify for State: the Mat Classic in the Tacoma Dome next week-end. Sunday, Summer and her boyfriend plan to start Valentine’s Day at 9 AM so it lasts longer. And in case she doesn't make it to state, Summer will go to Portland for a debating event. Andy says he'll wrestle in the state meet without a doubt.

I’m very happy for Ari Lidawer and his mom, Annette. I hope his grandmother feels her own incredible accomplishment in this. I, like billions of other parents, am bursting with knowledge more secret than Annette’s but just as certain: my children are the best in the universe.